More Big Surprises…Let’s talk about men.

More Big Surprises

The differences between men and women is a hot topic and emotions have inspired the creation of many books.

There have been many comments on Chapters 14 &15. I wrote at the beginning of Chapter 14 this note. She and her new husband are experiencing what new married couples do in the first two years compounded by her pregnancy

And, at the beginning of Chapter 15 this note. Keep in mind that this saga began with the younger street Ranger and the younger and more naïve Stephanie. Neither had as much baggage and he is not so embroiled with the special ops in my story. They are kind of growing together in this.

In the story, Stephanie and Ranger are newly wed and they are expecting.  They are both going through the pains together. He gave up much for her and marriage and made compromises with his men in choosing marriage and business over the military life. Does it make this Ranger softer and weaker?  What should he do to resolve this? How would you think that his life would affect a married life? How would his married status effect Rangeman as a business? Do you think that you would feel the same during a pregnancy even if you liked the business and the men? Is Stephanie being mostly immature? Let’s talk…


11 thoughts on “More Big Surprises…Let’s talk about men.

  1. jspencer says:

    Hmm… I think if Ranger is going to dwell/”throw it in Steph’s face” about what he gave up for her and their relationship, then they will continue to have problems. Yes, he is softer; weaker, no, not necessarily. He needs to learn to separate his two roles. Like you pointed out in the end of chapter 15, he was trying to put them “together as one unit.” Being married and showing support and love for your partner doesn’t mean you’re weak and shouldn’t affect his role as the boss. It humanizes him, yes, but he doesn’t need to act different towards his employees.
    Marriage is not easy. It has to include communication and compromise on both parts. Ranger is going to have to tough it out and open up his mouth and talk. Stephanie is going to have listen and she needs to try to be calm when they talk it out. Yelling and crying is not a good approach with a man like Ranger.
    I do agree with Stephanie’s decision to take off for awhile, especially since Ranger is basically doing the same. I don’t however agree with bringing her father into the mix. In my experience, involving others, especially parents, in your marital problems is a no-no. Sure, she should be able to have a confidant, but not if it turns to where that person will fight for her instead of just giving moral support. That’s part of growing up and also marriage… letting go of your parents and vice versa.

  2. basketcse says:

    Really great points! I think that Ranger may grow as much as Stephanie when it comes to figuring out what is really important? Newlyweds do a lot of yelling! I sat in the parking lot across from my condo and boo hoo’d. LOL Yup, I was one of those yellers and cryers.
    I brought Frank in for a purpose. They have some sharing to do and he has a place for her to go and may be a good type of catalyst for them. Coming up.

  3. Barb says:

    Ranger definatley needs to reality check on where he is now. Life is going to change when your married and have kids. If he thought it wouldn’t he needs a check! And how did no one comment on the guys teasing her for months. Why aren’t they being called out. He really needs to pay more attention. It’s hard enough being the only girl around but being prego makes you a mess! Can’t wait for the guys all to do some groveling and reality check

  4. Tanya Rhodes says:

    There was major childishness on all sides there. Ranger and Steph certainly didn’t think thru what having a baby would mean and what changes they would need. Rangeman is a place of business, not a place to live really. On the other hand, the guys were really out of line with some of their comments and actions too. They have such a military mindset that they really don’t think about how things really work in the real world. And of course they’re sexist. The military is inherently sexist by tradition and because of it’s very physical nature. Bobby would see that given his nurturing nature and the fact that he has been going to school in the real world.

    Interesting about Helen and Anthony. It explains a lot about Helen. Steph’s right, Frank needs to do something about his situation. He has a right to feel safe an happy in his life and relationships. I think he should sit down and explain things to Val, then move out and leave Helen on her own.

    I don’t necessarily agree about not getting parents or third party involved. I firmly believe that all couples need couples counseling because, let’s face it, we’re never really taught how to make the compromises and adjustments that are required to live together. I also think that any couple who are having a baby need counseling to work out how to be parents and still live together as a couple. Frank is someone who Steph would listen to and take advice from. I think Ranger would too. He could help Ranger and Steph work things out between them. He would be a good intermediary since he is Steph”s father and would have her interests at heart, but be able to relate to the guys and their issues and help Steph and Ranger relate to one another. Steph would listen to her Dad and her could keep her grounded until they work things out. Jus’ sayin’.

  5. basketcse says:

    I agree chicky. A third party from the outside can see more clearly what is on the inside. Too, I think all those men on the inside of Rangeman have their own issues, right? They are all in need. Like Tank and his kitties? LOL

  6. First off, let me say that I absolutely love the Big Surprises and More Big Surprises stories. I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time!! I do have to say that I’m not particularly liking the way this story is going (even though I know it says it’s an eventual HEA). Although, I agree with them having to experience a major obstacle that most married/committed/long time couples face. I think it just makes me worried that they won’t work it out and I just love them together LOL. I anxiously wait for the update alert to see if that day will be the day they get over it. I like that she is taking some time to herself to think it over but I do have to say that I was hoping that them growing up a bit would evolve their communication skills 🙂 (I understand they were different and he is more mercenary Ranger and she was basically an immature adult hahaha) I enjoy reading the ones where they grow apart and come back together and have their HEA. It makes them seem more like a real life couple than just characters in a story. I am in no way bashing you or your story (please don’t think that!!). I just wanted to let you know that I love it and I understand where you are going with it and it literally has me on the edge of my seat waiting to see what’s next! I think a lot of my anxiety over it is that most of the stories I find are already completed so I’m not waiting on the rest of the story (I’m not patient at all lol). The only minor complaint/criticism I may have is that the story has stopped making me laugh. Don’t get me wrong, I love all of it, I just got used to the daily laugh. Keep up the awesome work and I very much look forward to reading the rest of this story and anything else you write!! You are AWESOME 🙂

    • basketcse says:

      Don’t worry Angie, I didn’t really intend to go here. My fingers just typed in this direction and I thought, why not? Why shouldn’t they experience what real couples do as newlyweds? Readers that know me are more prepared for the monkey wrench called my angsty twists. Ha!

      They will come together in the next chap and Frank and his place was a good thing. It’s a place for him to open up and tell her the family story which will probably be good for them both. The cabin may be good for them all and Frank likes Ranger. So…

      There is no way that this story won’t end in an hea and won’t have lots more laughs. Steph is getting ready to cook for the guys. Yikes!

  7. Jspencer says:

    I just wanted to clarify that I’m not opposed to third parties being involved, such as a counselor, but those with Biased views and such. Friends and family usually, not always, will take sides and it can make matters worse. But the way you’ve handled your story with Frank and Ella is wonderful. They were definitely able to give the couple as a whole sound advice and support.

    • basketcse says:

      You are absolutely right. I have mentioned my family a couple times in author notes. I had experience with the type of involvement that you mention and one particular event has lasted for years when they wanted my husband to side with them on an issue with me. They caught him unawares and cornered him and he caved. The harm from that one night has lasted. I did make a point of making their influence in the story positive.

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